I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to use my mind to controls others, wherein I would use the energies within my mind in order to control how others would perceive me, as I was able to attain levels of energies which were extreme from within which my “presence” alone would be able to mesmerise others!
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use my mind’s energies in order to control others as myself, as through me experimenting high levels of energy as high positivity, I would at the same time control the levels of energies that others as myself would “feel”\experience within themselves as they mirrored my own, wherein the levels of energies I would be experimenting within myself within that time as high energy/positivity, would be enough to modify the levels of energies within those who contacted me, as they would thus reflect within themselves, the “high energy/high positivity” that was “my own” – Within this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe/perceive that the “high levels of energy/positivity” that I experienced within myself within those “special” occasions were my own, wherein I would experience the levels of high energy within myself after having “moved myself” as energy from within the mind.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define those experiences of me experimenting/living high levels of energy as being “special” within which I would “place upon a pedestal” the “experiences of high energy/positivity” because of perceiving the experience of me living out extreme levels of high energy, as being the “goal” of my life, as the “goal” upon which all other achievements are measured.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as my potential, as being equal and one with the experiences of “high energy/positivity”, instead of realising that my “potential” is not something to attain, as some “special” energy which propulses me within spheres of “high consciousness”, but that my potential as Equal as One as LIFE as physicality, is already HERE – all that I have to do, is to stop being “there” as the mind as that which I experience whenever I ride the waves of “high energy/positivity” and use the tools of writing, self-forgiveness, self-honesty and self-corrective application to stop my participation in such patterns of enslavement to energy.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use my mind as energy to control others through me exerting myself as my mind as high energy to others as myself, wherein I would deliberately participate within sessions of meditation where I would specifically exercise my mind to perform such “acts of control”, as I began to be aware after experimenting such a high for the first time, that I was able to manipulate the behaviours of others through changing my own – within this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have wanted/desired to control others through the energies of my mind, wherein I would deliberately “play” with the energies within my mind, in order to attain “high levels of energy” as I was addicted to the experience after the first time where I experienced such a degree of level of high energy.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be mermerised in front of the experience of me living out “high levels of energy” for the “first time”, wherein I would be so high within the energies within my mind, that I would be mesmorised by what was always busy occuring in front of me as the flow of time as now.
To be continued tomorrow…
I commit myself to, through writing, self-forgiveness, self-corrective application and self-honesty, write daily in my blog so as to become a living example to others as what it is to be a responsible human being which acts for the interest of what is best for all, as what is best for all is best for everyone, Equal and One with all living beings.
If and when I see myself moving or about to move into the mind through the “desire to use energy to control others” pattern, I stop, breathe, remind myself that it is a pattern of me as the mind I no longer want to engage in for it is not what is best for me and what is best for all, One and Equal.
When and as I see myself moving into the automatic personality of desire as the thought of “wanting to live experiences of high energy”, I stop, breathe, see if i have missed an opportunity to self-correct into Oneness and Equality from which the desire arose, if so, I forgive myself, stand up from the desire game and self-correct, if not i stop, self-forgive my participation in desire as an automated response to a pattern of self-abuse and bring myself back Here in and as Breath.
I commit myself to stop myself from entertaining ideas and beliefs about desiring experimenting feelings of high energy, through the use of thoughts and emotions, learned ideas and beliefs about the human condition, comparisons and games of winners and losers to establish myself as an example of how Life could be for everyone outside of the limited living of the Mind of illusions and back into Life as the Physical, One and Equal for every living Being.
I commit myself to assist and support myself through writing, self-forgiveness, self-corrective application and breathing – to stop the desires and stop judgments within and as me and so allow me to express myself unconditionally for the first time.
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