I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to expect that, because it’s my birthday, everyone will treat me specially as the character of the “birthday boy” claims that because it’s my birthday, that I am entitled to be treated royally by everyone who I come into contact with and that, within this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate within the feelings of “good energy” through the association made between the fact that it is my “birthday” and that I am supposed to “feel good” when it’s my birthday, instead of realising that through me accepting and allowing myself to “feel good” within this day as my birthday, that I accept and allow myself to be manipulated by the energies of the mind, and that I thus allow myself to be enslaved by the mind rather than stopping myself from being controlled by the mind, through the use of breathing, self-forgiveness, self-honesty and self-corrective application, so as to stop myself from participating within the mind and start acting within the physical as life in order to act within the best interest of all life, equal and one with all living beings.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel good within this day simply because it is my birthday, whereas I have accepted and allowed myself to re-live past experiences of birthdays that I have defined as being “good”, and thus have accepted and allowed myself to still be directed by the mind of illusions, rather than stopping my enslavement towards the mind through the tools of breathing, self-forgiveness, self-honesty and self-corrective application, so as to build self-trust as myself in order to eventually birth myself as life from the physical, and thus express myself unconditionally for the first time.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel bad about myself because of the fact that I haven’t planned on doing anything special for my birthday, whereas I am currently experiencing my birthday as being “just another day” wherein I have yet to do something “out of the ordinary” like what I have expected on doing in my “birthdays”, like going to “special places” with “special people” in my life, so as to make this day “stand out” so as to make these days a testament to the status of my egoistic self, seeking to inflate my ego with events and emotions that would be as outstanding as what the day of my “birthday” should be like, based on expectations and cultural programming towards what a “birthday” should be like.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate within expectations in relation to what my birthday should or should not be like, whereas I have accepted and allowed myself to participate within imagined pictures and images of what my “birthday” should be like, whereas I have used pictures and images taken from movies, tv shows, magazines and popular culture from within which I have built an expectation of what my birthday should be like, such as what a birthday is portrayed as being within the medias just mentioned – such as a “happy time” spent with friends and loved ones where the birthday person receives tremendous amounts of gift and “love” – while all the focus and attention is given unto the birthday person in order to ensure that that person may feel and experience itself as being “special”, while the “special” world we live in is put aside, allowing it’s abusive system to continue as is, as long as the “birthday” person is ensured of living a good experience for its birthday, while there is not attempt made by any person involved to make the world better, as one’s true birthday should be when the world will be treated as good as when a person celebrates its birthday.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel sad today because it’s my birthday and that I haven’t done anything special to make this day “special”, because of having associated birthdays with specialness, where I have come to expect that each and every one of my birthdays are to be made “special”, because a birthday is the celebration of the birth of a “special being” as myself as what my parents have repeatedly told me of being, being that of being special and that if I am not to have a “special day” upon my birthday, then that I am not “special” any longer, thus experiencing sadness/depression on my birthday because of not having had a “special day” on my birthday, which was today. Within this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate within the energies of the mind, such as the feeling experience of sadness, through me becoming sad today because of the fact that I haven’t done anything special to mark this supposedly special day, wherein I have allowed myself to wallow into the sadness of the mind as a reaction to the fact that I didn’t do anything special today – my birthday – instead of realising that a birthday is not really important as it only marks the day when one is born into this world and doesn’t change anything within how we live in this world as the system of abuse it currently is, and that as long as we don’t change what we have accepted and allowed ourselves to become equal and one with as the system of abuse of this world, that a birthday is non-important and that it only reinforces the control of the mind towards the individual as it allows feelings and emotions to control the individual into a slave of the mind – instead of stopping our enslavement towards the mind, through breathing, self-forgiveness, self-honesty and self-corrective application, so as to finally have a worthwhile reason for celebrating a birthday, which would be the birthday of humanity equally as one creating a world which is best for all life.
I commit myself to stop accepting and allowing myself to be emotional on my birthday, through the realisation that as long as I accept and allow myself to be controlled by my mind, that I automatically accept and allow myself to participate within energy as the mind which abuses/misuses substance as myself through the thusly generated friction and consumption of the physical as life for the own sustenance/survival of myself as finite Energy and in fact make the situation worse – to which I am ultimately not of energy, as who I am is one and equal with the physical as life eternal, wherein there is NO ENERGY which controls who I am as the physical.
I commit myself to, through writing, self-forgiveness, self-corrective application and self-honesty, write daily in my blog so as to become a living example to others as what it is to be a responsible human being which acts for the interest of what is best for all, as what is best for all is best for everyone, Equal and One with all living beings.
If and when I see myself moving or about to move into the mind through the reaction of “feeling emotionally saddened or happy because it’s my birthday” pattern, I stop, breathe, remind myself that it is a pattern of me as the mind I no longer want to engage in for it is not what is best for me and what is best for all, One and Equal.
When and as I see myself moving into the automatic personality of the “birthday boy”, I stop, breathe, see if i have missed an opportunity to self-correct into Oneness and Equality from which the personality arose, if so, I forgive myself, stand up from the personality game and self-correct, if not i stop, self-forgive my participation in personality as an automated response to a pattern of self-abuse and bring myself back Here in and as Breath.
I commit myself to stop myself from entertaining ideas and beliefs about myself as the “birthday boy”, through the use of thoughts and emotions, learned ideas and beliefs about the human condition, comparisons and games of winners and losers to establish myself as an example of how Life could be for everyone outside of the limited living of the Mind of illusions and back into Life as the Physical, One and Equal for every living Being.
I commit myself to assist and support myself through writing, self-forgiveness, self-corrective application and breathing – to stop the desires and stop the frictions/judgments/blame/spite within and as me and so allow me to express myself unconditionally for the first time.
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