Yesterday, I was arrested by the police because I wasn’t wearing a seat-belt. What happened was that I was driving away from home but had forgotten to buckle my seat-belt as I was driving. At about 5 km away from my home, as I was approaching a street intersection, I saw what seemed like the beginning of a police car, so, instantaneously, I moved my hand towards the seat-belt so that I could attach it before being seen by the policeman who was driving the police car. Unfortunately for me, the policeman saw my gesture and lit his revolving light in order to signify his intention towards me. At first, I was sure that he lit his revolving lights in order to stop me, but I continued driving as if I was innocent. The policeman had to do a u-turn in order for him to get behind me so as to arrest me, so because of that, I expected that I would be too far for him to catch me as he had to do a U-turn while I was continuing driving forward. However, I didn’t want to drive faster, as this would suggest that I was trying to run away from the infraction that I knew I had done. But I didn’t want to have to pay the ticket that I expected to pay because I was aware of the fact that I had just committed an infraction.
So I continued driving forward, as I looked in the mirror in order to see if the police car was following me. Unfortunately for me, the police car caught up with me and opened it’s revolving lights when he was right behind me, thus I knew that the policeman had seen the infraction and that he was about to give me a ticket.
Within me, as I was awaiting my sentence by the policeman, I felt all sorts of emotions and energetic reactions as I became completely possessed by my nerves as I was completely stressed because of the fact that I was looking for something good to say to the policeman that would exempt me from paying the infraction that I was expecting from the policeman. In my mind, I was planning to lie to the policeman, by telling him that the reason why I wasn’t wearing my seat-belt, was because that I just left my friend’s house which was located at a street which I just passed by before getting arrested.
Evidently, I was lying to the policeman because I hadn’t just left my friend’s house but that I had driven about 5 km from my home before noticing the policeman as I was within all that time, not wearing my seat-belt. However, I thought within the short time span that elapsed between the time where I was arrested by the policeman and the time where the policeman came to the side of my car’s window in order to talk to me, that the best solution for me in order to get out of this situation, through me aiming to get a warning instead of a ticket by the policeman, was to tell the policeman that I just left my friend’s house which was located just on the previous street that I passed by before noticing the policeman. So, the policeman told me that he would look in his map to see if the street was far from where he saw me buckle my seat-belt as I was driving. He then asked for me to give him my driver’s licence, my insurance certificate and my matriculation certificate so that he could verify in his car’s computer if everything was in check with me.
Unfortunately, because of the stress that I was experimenting within myself, I couldn’t remember where I had placed my matriculation certificate. So, after about 3 minutes of looking helplessly for my matriculation certificate within my wallet and my car, I told the policeman that I didn’t know where it was and asked him if it was a big deal if I wouldn’t give him my matriculation certificate. The policeman told me that he would have to see in his computer in order to determine if that would incriminate me further.
So, the policeman left and went back to his car with my driver’s license and my insurance certificate.
As I was waiting in the car for the policeman to return, I experienced a plethora of feelings and energetic reactions as I was completely stressed out because of the situation. I remembered to apply the techniques of breathing in order to focus my attention to where I was HERE rather than continuously participating within the games of the mind, such as the stress and emotions that I was experiencing at the time. However, the technique wasn’t able to remove the stress of the automatic participation within the mind that I was busy participating in as I was waiting for my sentence by the police officer who was still in his car as he was assumedly checking the validity of what I told him.
So, after about 5 minutes of waiting for the policeman to do his thing, he came back – the time spent waiting for the policeman to come back seemed longer though, as the stress and the emotions that I was experimenting within myself, were so overwhelming that the time seemed to pass slower. When the policeman came back, he then told me that he would let the seat-belt situation go for this time, but that he would have to give me a ticket because of not having given him my matriculation certificate. As I looked at the ticket, I noticed that the price that I would have to pay for the infraction was of 52 dollars, which was less then what I expected – as I expected that I would get a ticket for not wearing my seat-belt, which would have cost me a bit more than 100$ ( I knew the price of such an infraction because of having paid such a ticket in my past). So, feeling content that the price was less than what I expected, I told the police officer that it was “good enough”. The policeman then told me to remember to always wear my seatbelt and left.
Once the moment was over, the stress and emotions and energetic reactions that I experienced within myself, gradually left me – thus, all the parasitic thoughts that overcame me when I was waiting for the policeman to give me my sentence, left me. So, as I was again calm and stable within myself because of the fact that I had accepted my sentence, I looked again in my wallet to see if I had my matriculation certificate somewhere in there, as I was sure that I had placed it within my wallet. Because of not being stressed, I did in fact remember where I had placed my matriculation certificate so I went and had a look at the place in my wallet where I expected the certificate to be and, lo and behold, it was there as expected. Now, I might have well done the best thing for me in my situation, by me not giving him my matriculation certificate as the price of such an infraction ( not giving the matriculation certificate to the policeman) was less than the price of the infraction of me not wearing my seat-belt. I thus thought to myself that if I had given the matriculation certificate to the policeman, that he would have then given me the infraction for not wearing my seat-belt, as this would have been more costly for me than the infraction of not giving him my matriculation certificate.
The experience that I had with the policeman showed me that I am still enslaved to the mind, even with all the efforts that I have expressed to stop it since I began my 7 years process to life application a few months ago. I understand that the process will take me 7 years minimum to complete, but I feel as if I haven’t change anything within myself through the application since I reacted in almost the exact same way that I would have in the past (sweating excessively, not being able to talk/express myself clearly because of knowing that I had committed an infraction – in essence, I reacted the same way to the policeman that I reacted to the primary authority figure in my world as I was growing up = my father, etc.).
This only means that I have more points to consider within myself in order to effectively clear myself out of the addictions that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in within my mind.
I will write my self-forgiveness statements regarding this incident in my blog tomorrow.